London Live

Modtog denne mail fra en af mine kolleger, efter dagens moede hvor nye tiltag i firmaet blev introduceret, som kun ville kunne gennemfoeres i en KZ lejer. Fem minutter efter moedet var alle igang med at lede efter jobs online.

Dear director, boss and HR person, Michael Jackson, Satan and anyone else who like to fuck boys in the ass,

It is with great regret that I have to tender my resignation.
I've been offered a job as a fluffer on a porn set during the day, and a chimney sweep at night, and I feel it's just too good to turn down.
I would love to stay here and continue my career in this industry, but the working conditions up a chimney and a seedy basement in Soho are just a little more attractive.

I can't say it's not been enjoyable here. I've made enough money to eat half a tin of beans a night for 20 days a month, and the days when I don't eat, I would always fantasize about what hard-working people like the directors and managers of this world were feasting on. So thanks for that visual stimulation.

Perhaps one day, when I've swallowed enough semen and soot, I'd consider returning, though the fact i actually get to take my lunch break at my new employers might just swing it for them.

Once again, my apologies for leaving. It's been a pleasure getting absolutely fucked over by you for the last 6 months. I only hope you find someone as stupid as me to replace me.

Yours sincerely,

Your employee

Brug endelig denne mail som kladde, hvis du har lyst til at oedelaegge dine fremtidige jobmuligheder, og smaekke med doeren bag dig. Heldigvis har jeg allerede sagt op, og har kun to uger tilbage her i sweatshoppen.